Bloggers for More Birthdays: to the community of women
When my son was about three weeks old, a group of women on my block held a shower for me. It was an incredible gift. I was in the midst of my baby blues, bleary from lack of sleep and the shock of my life being just completely turned upside down. And so I was grateful for the company of these wise women who were my neighbors. I only knew one of them well, but we settled into the easy camaraderie of women sharing a beloved and familiar topic: babies, husbands, and the like. My mom was there too. Most of the women are grandmothers themselves, and they brought me the most wonderful, and wonderfully wrapped gifts. We ate cake, swapped baby stories and we had a grand old time. I nearly forgot I was tired.
Somehow, the subject of cancer came up. All six of the women, my mother included, were breast cancer survivors. We could only laugh at this uncanny coincidence. They all got cancer at different stages of life- some young, some post-menopause. Their stories were different, but rooted in similar and painful experiences. I sat and listened and was struck by the new fragility I felt as a mother: the sense that life is a gift, and that it is fragile as well. Like my tiny newborn, something to look after with care.
My mother doesn’t like the term survivor; she says it doesn’t fit what she feels like. Her cancer is done, we hope, and “survivor” is not an identity she claims. My neighbors, too, talked saltily about the nastier sides of chemo, treatment. I marveled at their ability to balance their cancer experiences within the larger scope of their lives. Some choose to be active in the breast cancer community and some prefer not to think about it. But they all fought the disease, and they all think about it every day. They did’t stop their lives, and they didn’t let it block them. I marvelled at this and felt grateful to listen in on the conversation.
It’s bittersweet that my baby shower included such a poignant and intense discussion of cancer. But its also somehow fitting. It reminds me of the cycles of female life, and the shared experiences that bring us women together, sometimes in happy circumstances, sometimes in sad, and mostly in a bittersweet way. I dedicate this post to my neighbors, to my mom, and to the community of women fighting breast cancer.
I’m supporting the American Cancer Society by blogging for more birthdays– blogging to raise cancer awareness. Please, join Bloggers for More Birthdays and dedicate a blog post to someone you love with cancer.
More links:
Darryle Pollack http://blog.darrylepollack.com/2009/09/birthdays-on-the-brain/
Catherine Morgan: http://www.catherine-morgan.com/
Julie Pippert- “Celebrating More Birthdays”
Thank you, Senator Stabenow
From MomsRising- click here to thank the Senator.
Today, Senator Kyl spoke against an amendment requiring that insurance companies provide maternity care for women. His reasoning, “I don’t need maternity care in MY insurance.” Senator Stabenow responded, “Your mom probably did.” Way to go, Senator!
Check out the video of this exchange: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3Jj6pqajvB8
Women, Men and Happiness: the ugly legacy of feminism?
Of all the comments to the piece Ellen Galinsky and I co-authored on the Huffington Post about women, men, and happiness, this one from JuniperSunshine is haunting me. I have no good explanation….help?
So, to sum up, since the Feminists pushed to encourage mothers to work full time:
1. Women are very unhappy
2. Men are slightly unhappy
3. Children are unhappyBut yet, we keep hearing that squeezing family life into the edges of a busy, hectic schedule is necessary. This is called “progress”. Not only that, the days of parents raising their own children, which has worked for 2 million years, will never happen again. I’d call our society a massive experiment in prioritizing income over children, not a “transition”. Hopefully we can come out of it with not just a respect for the choices of individual men and women – the best part of Feminism – , but with an better understanding of what really makes us happy in life.
Read more at: http://www.huffingtonpost.com/morra-aaronsmele/women-men-and-happiness-w_b_297518.html
Health Care blogging
MomsRising’s Health Care blog carnival is really good…
And in Huffington Post, Joan Blades asks the right question (I’m paraphrasing) — why can’t our “leaders” in Washington lead us to better health care?
How to pass a public option…
What you need to know about state policies and health care reform. Great post from Momocrats here.
About Me
Morra Aarons-Mele utilizes social media strategies to help employers, employees and communities connect. She also consults with leading organizations on how women can use the internet for professional and personal development. In her spare time, Morra enjoys blogging about women and politics. Read her full bio >>
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